Monsters Vs. Aliens

The Aliens are coming, the aliens are coming! The military has counterattacked and failed. There's only one answer: the Monsters. Gosh, that solution never would have occurred to me.

But there you have it: the plot. Monsters vs. Aliens ain't Shakespeare, or even sci fi-disguised-as-The-Tempest (Forbidden Planet), but it's an engaging, colorful romp.

We went to see the 3D version because, well, why not? The three-dimension effect is the best I've ever seen, ever since I used to read 3D comic books like Batman with the glasses included, as well as go to 1970's-issued 3D movies. Those effects were like an Atari computer compared to the current computers. These effects are eye-popping.

They're also head-splitting. I got a ferocious headache about a third into the movie. I took the cumbersome plastic glasses off, which gave me almost instant relief, but I put them back on again. Who wants to sit there for another hour with nothing to watch?

The movie is filled with lots of gags, jokes and homages you get if you've seen the old sci fi movies like I have. Like, Susan is 49-feet and 11 and three quarters tall.....just one quarter inch shorter than the 50-foot woman. When our President (voiced funnily by Stephen Colbert) goes up to the alien starship, the first thing he does is play the five-note theme from Close Encounters of the Third Kind....badly.

I did wonder, however, about the end. Our Monster heroes were afforded freedom from government scrutiny after they slayed the aliens. But there's no Witness Protection Program for the 50-foot-almost woman; how can she disappear into society?

But stop worrying about what makes sense, and see the movie. Just take some aspirin with you.

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